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“Everyone’s a dreamer,
Everybody’s a star,…”


The Kinks
Celluloid Heroes

Just by that title, I know you want to click the x and go to bed. I don’t blame you. I don’t blame you at all. Hear me out, however.

The thing is, where did this freak come from? Why is she considered to have talent? Is it because of Hannah Montana? Is it because her father did Achy-Breaky Heart?

I have nothing bad to say about Miley. I don’t have anything bad to say about Billy Ray. They seemed like a normal family,…until,…you know,…that whole tongue thing. The tongue thing kinda fucked me up for a while. I mean, she’s a pop music star, right? What was with the tongue? It struck me as really demented that she would actually go out there and show the world her thrush.

It just didn’t make any sense.

Then there was that whole deal where her whitey-tighties were making her butt look less than desirable. Like they were put on wrong or something.

I guess the thing is,…I don’t think enough about Miley to like her or dislike her. I just gotta wonder why she is here and what she has to offer that I seem to be missing, that’s all. It’s not a “hater” thing,….

It’s a “what-am-I-missing” thing.

I mean, if she was as good looking as Brittany Spears, I might find a certain erotic credibility with her.

But she’s not. Not even close.

She almost looks like Justin Bieber.

Anyway,…

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