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Tag Archives: food

“I can make the runner stumble,
I can make the fire grow dark,
And I can make every time and the son of a whistle,
and I can make all the the stadiums rock!

…and I’m never gonna make it like you do.
Making love out of nothing at all….”

Air Supply
Making Love Out Nothing At All

(No Google search for lyrics on this. I winged it….sorry.)

I was married during the Reagan administration. We were taught to be polite.

But when someone at a Burger King drive through is told to pull up because their specialty order will take a few extra minutes….it doesn’t mean that they should pull up by a mere two feet….thus-by blocking the person with the regular order in.

Honk.

Honk.

Honk, honk!

(Car moves up and lets me out of the way of his fat ass.)

(Asshole.)

Cripes.

Idiot.

Anyway…

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“If some of ya’ll never been down South too much…
I’m gonna tell you a little bit about this, so that you’ll understand,
What I’m talking about,….”

Elvis
Polk Salad Annie

A few years ago, I had seen a cooking show in which Elvis’s cook demonstrated the making of Elvis’s favorite sandwich. This is the real deal. It’s been a staple in my house ever since. It is truly decadent.

Here are the ingredients you will need:

1 banana
4 teaspoons of peanut butter
brown sugar
butter
2 slices of Italian bread.

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Take the butter and butter up one side of each slice of bread.

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Place a generous amount of brown sugar on the buttered side of each slice of bread. Most of the brown sugar will adhere to the bread due to the adhesive nature of the butter.

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Place in pan with the buttered and brown sugared side down. Don’t worry if a bit of brown sugar falls off while flipping it. It will still be put to good use.

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Dissect banana. Should a small dog appear like what just happened here, just ignore him. He just had some kibble.

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Peel banana and place into small bowl. Continue to ignore the filthy little beggar with the sad eyes.

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Smash banana until it becomes almost like baby food. The banana will take on a wet-like consistency. This is to be desired. Continue to ignore the fat bastard to the right.

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Spread peanut butter on dry side of bread that is in pan. I like to use crunchy, but if you don’t like that, creamy works just as well. I would not use organic peanut butter however. I believe Elvis would disavow that in his sandwiches.

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Place smashed banana onto one side of the peanut-buttered bread, then top with a small amount of brown sugar. This will give a certain sweetness to the banana mixture.

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Place in pan and grill fry over medium heat,..like you would a grilled cheese. The brown sugar on the other side of the bread will begin to crystalize. This is to be desired for crunch effect.

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Flip together and grill the both sides of the sandwich. You will notice the brown sugar taking on a harder texture due to the heat. That’s what’s considered as being, “the good stuff”,…oh, yeah.

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Once the sandwich is grilled throughly on both sides, remove and place on a cutting board.

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Dissect the sandwich at the corners. The peanut butter/banana paste may spill out a bit due to the pressure of the knife. This is to be desired for presentation.

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Serve promptly with a garnishment of a dill pickle and a packet of natural cane turbinado sugar. An ice cold root-beer would be a good choice of a beverage to go with this meal.

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And that’s that!

Easy enough.

(Oh, alright, already!! Give him some! How can you turn that hungry face away? Geez. What a beggar! I hope he chokes on it!)

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Anyway,…