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Tag Archives: rage

“And the sign said “Long-haired freaky people need not apply,”
So I tucked my hair up under my hat and I went in to ask him why,
He said, “You look like a fine upstanding young man, I think you’ll do,”
So I took off my hat, I said “Imagine that. Huh! Me workin’ for you!”
Whoa-oh-oh!……”

I was toiling at my job today when the song, “Signs”, scrolled across the ol’ pod. It has been a standard for the counter-culture for as long as I can remember. The song has spanned generations and still gets radio play with great frequency.

Some things birthed by The Five Man Electrical Band are just born to stay, I guess.

Not a bad song, on the whole, but during the 3 or so minutes of the song, it actually gives a black eye to the counter-culture movement rather than praise it…as it was originally intended to do.

The irony of it all is really quite sobering if you think about it.

My witness to the song is neither to the right or the left. I actually, truth be told, swing to the conservative end of the spectrum whilst doing my best to look like a lefty of the old guard. I guess what I mean is that I look like a hippy, yet tend to vote non-Democrat….and it hasn’t always been that way either. There was a time I was truly a Democrat. I understand where they’re comin’ from, man.

The thing about this song is found in it’s human-ness. It’s just the typical selfish attitude of, “I want what I want when I want it”. We all fall victim to that once in a while,…but when it’s enhanced and condensed into a three minute song, there’s just something about those lyrics that can truly grate on a person’s nerves.

Here’s what I mean.

We take this first set of lyrics:

“And the sign said “Long-haired freaky people need not apply,”
So, I tucked my hair up under my hat and I went in to ask him why,
He said, “You look like a fine upstanding young man, I think you’ll do,”
So I took off my hat, I said “Imagine that. Huh! Me workin’ for you!”
Whoa-oh-oh!

Granted, this young man is angry for some reason. Since the song starts there, we do not know the cause of his anger. You can even hear it in his voice when he starts singing. He already has a chip on his shoulder.

We can garner, due to his piqued fury, that the sign he read may have been paraphrased due to his anger. But we don’t know this, do we? It could have very well said, “Clean-cut gentlemen wanted for food preparation. Must wear hair-net. Interested applicants please apply inside. Thank You.”

If he were to truly put up a sign that said, “Long-haired freaky people need not apply,”, he would probably have a law suit levied against him by the ACLU,….which could be pretty pricey when it comes to court costs. Small business owners tend to know when to pick their battles in cases of possible legal interjection and potential legal injunctions.

Be that as it may, because of his attitude, he felt he had to play some shenanigans with the shop owner or restauranteur who kindly complimented him on his appearance and offered him a job so he could EARN some money….but then the young man decided hat the best course was to deride and ridicule the person who was offering him gainful employment.

Moving on….

“And the sign said anybody caught trespassin’ would be shot on sight,
So I jumped on the fence and-a yelled at the house,
“Hey! What gives you the right?,
To put up a fence to keep me out or to keep mother nature in,
If God was here he’d tell you to your face, Man, you’re some kinda sinner!….”

Now, here our hero decides that it’s a dashed good idea to provoke home-owners by testing the limits as to how far he can go before the owner of the property actually pulls a gun and shoots him because he feels threatened by him. It becomes a wanton disregard to his own safety to do this because the right to bear arms is very clear in matters of self-defense. People have a right to protect themselves from unstable people who tread onto and into their property uninvited. There are trespassing laws, young man. They are on the books and have been for a very, very long time. Even in 2014, people can own property,…and have the right to protect that property and the souls that dwell on that property.

As a side note, the declaration about whether or not God is here shows a true lack of theological knowledge. To say “if” means you’re not too sure. If you invoke the name of God and brazenly presume to know what He would say in this particular given instance, then that means you have a simple, cursory understanding of who He is,…and your presumption that you can actually anticipate what He would say truly makes you seemingly above God….or greater than. That is called, “Mania” my friend. They have medication for that now.

Moving on,…

“Now, hey you, mister, can’t you read?
You’ve got to have a shirt and tie to get a seat,
You can’t even watch, no you can’t eat,
You ain’t supposed to be here,
The sign said you got to have a membership card to get inside….
Ugh!….”

Here we get into your philosophy, young man. In those five lines uttered, you have turned the looking glass upon yourself. In your reckless abandon of fury, you have decided that any and all rules and regulations are simply fallow and unjust because it doesn’t include your unblemished and regimented train of thought. Some places, if you don’t have a tie, they give you one free of charge! As far as membership cards go, I can’t go to the local BJ’s because I never applied for a card. If I were to take the time to do so, I would be admitted. I just don’t know what I would do with that much Ramen or spaghetti sauce, that’s all. I choose not to get a card,…but I can if I so desire. It takes all of five minutes. You have much more than five minutes available,….you just turned down a job….

Moving on,…

“And the sign said, “Everybody welcome. Come in, kneel down and pray,”
But when they passed around the plate at the end of it all,
I didn’t have a penny to pay,
So I got me a pen and a paper and I made up my own little sign,
I said, “Thank you, Lord, for thinkin’ ’bout me. I’m alive and doin’ fine.”
Wooo!…..”

And here is where we come full circle, my job-less friend. Need I remind you that not more than 2 minutes ago, you were offered gainful employment which you turned down with no chance of another interview. That’s why you didn’t have a penny to pay,….which, theologically speaking, you are not paying anything. You are tithing. That is supposed to be 10% of your total income. Now, say, if you found ten dollars in the street, you would be obliged to “tithe” one dollar,….and your actions in that would then be multiplied. It is the only area in which God says we can “test” Him. But you already know that since you know what God is gonna say before He says it, correct?

So,…you see, my loud-mouthed friend,…..that commie crap only goes so far. We are not communist yet,…..close, but not yet. My advice to you is to go back to school, get a degree and become a part of society. The way you live is way too hard and way too in the dark. I applaud you for your determination to stick to your principals, but they are doing you more harm than good.

You can still be a rebel. There’s no problem there. You can smart off to the boss when you have seniority. Just focus a bit. Gain some footing,…but this moving around ten times in a three minute song just ain’t gonna pay off, man. Tom Hayden and Abbie Hoffman had to pay their dues to become credible.

You should too.

Anyway,…

“Well, I guess I should confess that I am starting to get old,
All the latest music fads all passed me by and left me cold,
All the kids are talking slang I won’t pretend to understand,
All my friends are getting married, mortgages and pension plans,
And it’s obvious my angry adolescent days are done,
And I’m happy and I’m settled in the person I’ve become,
But that doesn’t mean I’m settled up and sitting out the game,
Time may change a lot but some things may stay the same,….


Frank Turner
Photosynthesis

Ya know,..when you go to a resale shop, you kinda expect that the wares they sell will be in some sort of systematic order. When it’s not, it’s nothing more than a garage sale, isn’t it?

When the lighting is sub-par, it makes you feel like you’re bein’ cheated. I hate that crap.

Why is it that most of the furniture smells pretty moldy. You wanna sell me something? Make sure that it doesn’t smell bad, OK? It ain’t that hard. There’s this little thing called “Febreeze”. Spray it a few times a week. Is that that hard?

Ya know,….I really think the French Connection is the greatest movie ever made Why do I think that? Who cares? Do you care? I don’t freakin’ care. It’s just a damn good movie. What? Do I have to explain myself?

Good night.

Just so ticked off today.

Anyway,….

“Maybe you and me were never meant to be,
just maybe think of me once in a while,
I’m at WKRP in Cincinnati….”


WKRP In Cincinnati
Theme Song

This snow’s a bitch, ain’t it?

Geez. We’re getting pummeled where I am at. I thought it was a fluke this year. I thought it would fake us out. Nope. The weather is playin’ the blitz play and there’s no gettin’ off this train until it stops, man. Full speed ahead until the end of March and then possibly gettin’ hit one more time in mid-April.

You would almost think the government is behind it.

I know one thing that’s NOT behind it and that’s my freakin’ car, man. I got a stupid little Honda Civic. Great car in the summer,…but it’s crap in the winter. I haven’t gotten stuck yet. That’s a good thing. This front wheel drive stinks,…but the car moves like a panther in more conducive climate….so it has it’s shares of gives and takes….but in winter it’s just slides and shakes.

I don’t know about you, but I’m one of those people who does that whole preventative thing in October. I make sure I have jumper cables. I make sure I have a bottle of anti-freeze in the trunk along with some tools that you don’t think you need but you really do. Like a portable air-compressor (due to tires running dangerously low air pressure the colder it gets. The sensor will say that you are low, but air,….I dunno,….contracts….because of the cold. It expands when it gets warmer. Make any sense? I have seen my tire air pressure read low in the cold and when it warms up, the light on the dash will go off.)

In spite of all my preparations, I still can’t get past the dreaded summit debacle that ensues every night about this time. The parking lot where I work is accessed by a rather steep hill that is enclosed by a chain-link fence,…which makes your point of entry and your escape rather harrowing in the winter months.

It’s like a winter olympic bobsleigh race. Picture, if you will, a little black bobsleigh trying to go up a hill,…and that’s where you see me behind the wheel of my Honda. It looks cool as hell going down it, but goin’ up it, I look like and idiot. Goin’ down it, I look like Gene Hackman in the French Connection.

Writing about it, I sound like an idiot.

Oh,…yeah,….and it doesn’t help that our municipality plays this poverty game every winter.

“We don’t have enough money to buy salt and pay our plow-drivers because you all voted the speed cameras out. If we had THAT revenue, we could buy salt,…so you did it to yourselves.”

Then the cops,….you know what they do? They lay in wait for you to come slip-slidin’ down the street and then pull you over for “failure to control.” I seen it happen, man. So bogus. You’re sliding down the street and shit and they pull you over an say you’re not controlling your vehicle properly.

“Report to the city and pay the fine!”

Ya know,….this cabin fever is total bullshit.

Came home to make some stuffed cabbages, but was so late, I had to settle for a Bob Evan’s breakfast bowl instead. (nothin’ like rubbery, microwaved eggs….)

Now all that’s left is to crawl under the covers and turn on “Terror By Night”….starring Basil Rathbone, Nigel Bruce and Skelton Knaggs.

(I swear,…Skelton Knaggs had to be a creep in real life. He gives me the chills just watchin’ him, man. Dude is bogus. Just hearin’ him talk sends my ass into a pucker.)

Anyway,….